Michael Moore Caption Contest - PRIZE TO BE WON!!

Jameson's picture
Submitted by Jameson on Wed, 2009-10-07 04:05

Fat bastard needs a caption. The winner for the best caption will receive a prize (yet to be announced) worth US$25.

Well done, Brant! Smiling


Brant Gaede's picture

Maybe it'll go viral.


>the winner is...

sharon's picture

... BRANT for: "The priests refused to abuse me."

Well done, Mr Gaede. Can you please message me so I work out how to get you your prize.<

Damn, I was gonna use that line.

Gratz Brant

Sandi's picture

Great line!


Brant Gaede's picture

Don't forget to put the caption on the picture. Innocent



Brant Gaede's picture

Just make a contribution to Objectivist Living. Evil

Or Solo. Sad



Jameson's picture

... BRANT for: "The priests refused to abuse me."

Well done, Mr Gaede. Can you please message me so I work out how to get you your prize.

G Smiling


Jameson's picture

Vote for your favourites now!!! Smiling

Now here's a comment to chew over

Sandi's picture

"Not many people can draw fat" indeed and 300 years ago not many people could draw snowflakes.
(Kudos to Robert Hooke)


Brant Gaede's picture

Not many people can draw fat.

ignorant statement that may be true

I've had a belly for a long time now...

Marcus's picture

...but it expands and decreases at various times.

I was in Croatia on the Istrian coast at the time (via car from Austria), enjoying great sunny autumn-type weather for October. You could even still swim in the Mediterranean, diving amongst the colourful, exotic fish.

My waste-line tends to expand when I visit places with great food I can't resist, like Austria.

Anyway, skinny people over the age of 30 tend to be unwell Smiling

Micahel your art is provocative and inspirational

Sandi's picture

to me to look deeper. Do I view the fat lady with wider eyes?

What fascinates me the most are the lines above the top shoulder.

Given the shape of the shoulder and the straight lines directly above it, I wonder why they are there? However I do suspect it has something to do with symmetry (yep had to spell check that one - not a word I use very often - maybe I am learning a bit about art after all - wink).

Kudos to your passion and talent Michael, you bring/create life which is an oxymoron considering what I have seen produced from the hand of Jesus.

I've noticed....

Olivia's picture

Marcus, are you getting a belly?

... this often happens. The woman has the baby, the man gets a belly. Evil

"I'm surprised you don't

Newberry's picture

"I'm surprised you don't think of it as a fat joke though..."

ah, us artists love drawing big people, but I hate to draw repulsive personalities. Eye



Marcus, are you getting a

Newberry's picture

Marcus, are you getting a belly?

Christian Capitalists

Jeff Perren's picture

"Ever heard of a Christian Capitalist party?"

Yes. In the U.S. they're called Republicans.

Newberry should lighten up...

Marcus's picture

...a few weeks ago someone asked me, upon seeing my belly, what stage of preganacy I was in. I thought that was funny.

With more fat jokes in the world, there would be less need to spend tax-payer's money on anti-fat campaigns.

Karl Lagerfeld: curvy women should stay off the catwalk

13 Oct 2009

Responding to news that a popular German magazine was banning thin models from its pages in favour of "real women", Largerfeld said that those who criticised models for looking bony or anorexic were fat " chip-eating", jealous mummies.

"No one wants to see curvy women," he was quoted as saying on the website of news magazine Focus.

"You've got fat mothers with their bags of chips sitting in front of the television and saying that thin models are ugly."

The world of fashion was about "dreams and illusions", he said, dismissing as "absurd" the debate prompted by Brigitte magazine which said it would no longer feature professional models on its pages.

Brigitte, one of Germany's top women's magazines, said last week it would only publish photographs of "real women" after readers complained they could not identify with the models depicted.

Lagerfeld, who has subjected himself to a rigorous slimming schedule, described the magazine's decision as absurd and said it had fallen victim to overweight women. The 71-year-old designer added: "Nobody wants to see a round woman."...


Fat at 40 is better than thin, scientists warn

It is better to be fat than thin at age 40, according to a new study which shows that the overweight are likely to live longer than those who are slim.

12 Oct 2009

Contrary to the widely held belief that it is healthier to be slim, researchers in Japan found that the life expectancy of the overweight at 40 was six years longer than that of their thinner counterparts.

Those who were slimmer were also at higher risk of cardiovascular disease, according to the major study, conducted over a ten-year period by scientists at Tohoku University

Researchers examined the health, weight and life expectancy of 44,000 people aged between 40 and 79 living in the Miyagi Prefecture region of Japan, Kyodo News reported.

People were divided into four categories based on their body mass index (BMI) - including underweight, normal, overweight and obese – before scientists calculated their life expectancy.

The study found that among those aged 40, the overweight category topped the polls in terms of the longest life expectancy, with expectations of an average of 40.5 extra years for men and 47 years for women.

Those classed as "normal" weight followed closely behind, with 38.7 additional years expected among men and 46.3 among women, the study showed.

However, researchers found that those defined as slim were bottom in terms of life expectancy, with 33.8 further years predicted among men and 41.1 among women...


Topical with the new

Aaron's picture

Topical with the new Catholic focus, and quite funny. I'm surprised you don't think of it as a fat joke though; it still plays off Moore being physically repulsive. Or maybe it is making fun of ugly instead of fat, and only one's OK to laugh at?

Brant's: "The priests

Newberry's picture

Brant's: "The priests refused to abuse me" has my vote, short, not a fat joke, perhaps the truth, relevant, and so whinny to be perfect.



Look around the world...

Ross Elliot's picture

...and you see many political parties named Christian Socialist.

Ever heard of a Christian Capitalist party?

"Capitalism is the way of the devil and exploitation. If you really want to look at things through the eyes of Jesus Christ–who I think was the first socialist–only socialism can really create a genuine society." -- Hugo Chavez

Regarding Castro...

Marcus's picture

...it's an interesting point that even the North Koreans have attempted to show-case some Christian Churches in Pyongyang to show how 'tolerant' they are.

I know that Kim Il-sung and Josef Stalin both had a Christan upbringing and then proceeded to make a religious 'cult' out of their own personalities.

If someone did some research they would probably find a very good historical link between Christianity and Communism.

Well, that is interesting

Ross Elliot's picture

Maybe that's why Catholic conservatives like O'Reilly haven't gone anywhere near this film. Hannity interviewed him, and did a very poor job of it.

Moore's done us a favor by making clearer the link between bible altruism and the destruction of the modern world.

But he's also a self-serving hypocrite, making much of the commie Cuban health system in Sicko. That said, it's possble the Castros still go to Mass.


Lindsay Perigo's picture

That's the best so far. Brant does have his moments.

The priests

Brant Gaede's picture

"The priests refused to abuse me"

"In our household Oprah...

Marcus's picture

...'Lent' was short for 'lend me a burger'. I usually could build up a pile on my plate about this size."

The Left ...

Lindsay Perigo's picture

... went in for religion yonks ago. And Catholics and Dem-scum have long been aligned.

The point

Jmaurone's picture

is regarding the D/M theory, that the left would start to go in for religion...

It is not ...

Lindsay Perigo's picture

... a point for Peikoff. Peikoff would have us vote for Moore's pin-ups across the board. On the grounds of an imminent theocracy. Rubbish.

There's something unconscionable about giving voting orders like that while proscribing the formation of a decent political party with candidates worth voting for.

Ominous parallels...

Jmaurone's picture

"Moore admits to being practising Catholic..."

Hmmm...another point for Peikoff...

Moore admits to being practising Catholic...

Marcus's picture

...but opts out of fasting on friday! Innocent

Michael Moore's anti-capitalist crusade

The American film-maker has shocked many of his rightwing critics by revealing he is a practising Catholic

Paul Harris
The Observer, Sunday 11 October 2009

Rightwing critics of controversial film-maker Michael Moore call him many things: a socialist, a hypocrite, unpatriotic – and they even make unkind remarks about his weight.

But, with his new anti-capitalist film showing on US movie screens last week, Moore has unveiled an unexpected trump card against conservatives who so vociferously attack him: Christianity. Moore is a practising Catholic and has put religion at the core of Capitalism: A Love Story. Alongside the political arguments about inequality, Wall Street corruption and the failures of George W Bush, Moore argues that capitalism is also fundamentally unchristian.

In the film he interviews several Catholic priests, who explain their belief that capitalism and the free market, by emphasising greed and the self over community, go against the Bible's basic tenets. One priest, Dick Preston, tells Moore: "Capitalism is evil, immoral and contrary to the teachings of Jesus." Moore also describes his own Catholic upbringing and includes a skit where free-market slogans are dubbed inappropriately – and hilariously – over scenes from a movie of Jesus's life...


"Come on Oprah face up to it

Sandi's picture

I'm richer than you, my flatulence is compulsory hence I am more credible than you.
He may be the man, but his straw ain't big enough to swallow all of my Kyoto cut! "


Brant Gaede's picture

"Sorry for the stink, the capitalists won't wipe my ass"


Brant Gaede's picture

"I'll buy you a new couch"


Brant Gaede's picture

"I'm sitting on your cat"

Then the I-beam

Brant Gaede's picture

"Then the I-beam broke and I landed on my head"

I hate

Brant Gaede's picture

"I hate Ayn Rand"

I'm here

Brant Gaede's picture

"I'm here for the free Humvee"

I treat

Brant Gaede's picture

"I treat my workers like shit"

I love

Brant Gaede's picture

"I love Castro"

I killed

Brant Gaede's picture

"I killed capitalists"

I couldn't

Brant Gaede's picture

"I couldn't believe the DNA test results, either, Mom."

If I

Brant Gaede's picture

"If I stand up I'll fart"

Sad, but true.

Frediano's picture

One of my life's greatest disappointments was when I learned that at Subway, 12 inches means length and not diameter.

You know...

Ross Elliot's picture

...I don't have a caption, but Moore is so fucking dumb, he makes cheese look smart.

Greg: "Rolling on the floor" (laughing)

Sandi's picture

A bit like any credible scientitist does when Moore opens his fat flabby and very loose jowls.

2nd entry

Kenny's picture

Sicko and Thicko!

First entry

Kenny's picture

Money can't buy class or style!

Marcus has my vote also

mvardoulis's picture

Grotesque and crass as possible...! LOVE IT!!!

Look, let me in

gregster's picture

what the hell does "ROFL" mean?


Sandi's picture

You've got my vote Marcus!

Or could it be?

Marcus's picture

"So Fidel Castro had my nuts in this vice-like grip and said - 'if you don't say my system is best I'm gonna sweeze'! You should of seen it Oprah, I got so excited that I came all over him. He looked like Santa Claus in the end."

But seriously

Sandi's picture

"Geesh Oprah, my tits used to be out here. Praise be to Obama, breast reduction surgery is totally covered in socialised medicine.

Is it ...

Lindsay Perigo's picture

"Is it a hairpiece? You can't tell, can you?"

I tried

Brant Gaede's picture

"I tried all your diets"


I'm aspiring to be John

James Heaps-Nelson's picture

I'm aspiring to be John Candy- I'd be funny if I weren't so scary.

"Fat jokes are not funny."

Newberry's picture

"Fat jokes are not funny."

Here's one...

Marcus's picture

"Like I tell people Oprah: it's not that we're fat, it's just that our butlers keep forgetting to take the coat hanger out in the morning."

"I'm telling ya, there's a

Callum McPetrie's picture

"I'm telling ya, there's a serious inequality of body fat distribution in this country, Oprah."

Glenn, it's hard to find...

Ross Elliot's picture

...good talent, isn't it?

Jesus H.

Kyrel Zantonavitch's picture

"Jeeze, Mike...after looking and listening to you for a while, you're even more fat, ugly, stupid, and disgusting than I am!"

For the record...

Jameson's picture

I like some of Aaron's too... but that's not the point: a caption works best when it's a caption, not a string of captions. Smiling

There's no rule stopping multiple entries... just do it one at a time.


sharon's picture

"Pimping socilaism for my peggy bank."

"Look at what Capitalism has

Newberry's picture

"Look at what Capitalism has done to me."


Jmaurone's picture

But Aaron's are by far my favorite, especially the Tom Cruise one, and the asking Oprah what capitalism has done for her...

What part of 'one caption per post' didn't you understand?

Jameson's picture

Aaron, I want people to choose their captions carefully—not brain fart.

I'm not too concerned with

Aaron's picture

I'm not too concerned with the contest - it's just entertaining making fun of Michael Moore so who can stop at just one?

"So there I was still polishing my 'Columbine' Oscar when it struck me - you mean all I had to do was film myself eating for 30 days?!"

"A lot of people are attacking the new healthcare program for lack of choice. That's just not true. There will be ten - count them, ten! different Peoples' Clinics convenient located around the country that Americans will be able to choose."

"Me? 52 triple-D. Don't you hate how hard it can be to find one with proper support?"

Keep trying, it gets bigger.

Frediano's picture

"Sorry. Please have one of your lackeys warn me next time we come back from commercial, and I won't hang on to your earrings like that."

Oprah's Success

Luke Setzer's picture

Oprah, you were once a big fat ass like me. How did you lose weight? Inquiring minds want to know!

Here goes

Sandi's picture

"Its all about sacrifice. People must open their hearts and give more"

"What can I tell ya, Oprah...

Jameson's picture

... I'm a gigantic cock."

Bloody good start

Jameson's picture

Multiple entries are permitted, but only one per post.

Oh now Aaron

Olivia's picture

... that's just cheating!

You've got to pick ONE - eh Glenn?

Love the one about Oprah... ahahahahaa.

Fun.. "Well sure, I could

Aaron's picture


"Well sure, I could jump on the couch too. If I wanted to. Maybe I just don't want to. But I could. What are you trying to say?"

"And *this* is what was left of Flint, Michigan after I got done helping them!"

Bowling for those too muscularly atrophied to lift an actual 8 pound ball

"So, Oprah, what's capitalism ever done for *you*?"


Olivia's picture

"Yeah, it really hurt a lot whenever those rich kids all called me Lumbering-Lardass-Limpdick-Loser, but I vowed to myself that one day I'd show 'em - I'd show 'em just what sort of person I really am inside."


Jeff Perren's picture

"So, here I wuz holding my inflamed testicle like this when Dr. Oz says... 'You support socialized medicine, yes?'"

My Vote

Michael Moeller's picture

Michael Moore Deranged Than Robert Campbell, If That's Possible.

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