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Linz's Mario Book—Updated!
Obleftivist Yawon Bwook says Donald Twump is "THE villain of our time." Which of the following best accords with your view?
Yes he is
He's not a villain but a hero
Putin might be a bigger villain
The mullahs might be bigger villains
ISIS might be bigger villains
Ugly Wimmin might be bigger villains
Black Lives Matter might be bigger villains
Snowflake moronnials might be bigger villains
College professors might be bigger villains
Fake News outlets might be bigger villains
Pomowankers might be bigger villains
Obleftivists might be bigger villains
None of the above—specify
Total votes: 9
Submitted by Lindsay Perigo on Wed, 2011-03-30 13:21
[Broadcast on Stratos TV, Sky 89, Thursday March 24, 7.30 pm.
Good evening and welcome to this the first edition of Perigo! I'm Lindsay Perigo and I'm dangerous. "Perigo," you see, is Portuguese for "danger," and I'm here to live up to that.
Dangerous to whom? Dangerous to those who don't know and don't care about the difference between whom and who for starters. That may sound trivial, but hear me out. I'm after the child abusers who have insisted that grammar, vocabulary, spelling and punctuation are of no importance, as a result of which we are confronted with Generation Airhead, that cannot punctuate, spell, construct a sentence—or think. And that is not trivial. The teacher unions whose own members don't know what an apostrophe is … the Ministry of Education bureaucrats and Teachers Colleges that spawned and raised them … to these child-molesters of the mind, Perigo intends to be a danger.
Similarly, to the Media Mediocrity Mafia, the television news executives who've unleashed bimbo Generation Airhead reporters who cannot speak onto the airwaves. Reporters who sound like Air New Zealand flight attendants—sorry, Ear New Zuwwid—who used to sound as glamorous as they used to look, but now say, "Woo arroyv UN Wawington ET sucks o'clock"—emphasising all the wrong words and mangling every last one of them. That's what you now "hair ON tawwavushun"—adenoidal airheads who've rendered the channels' news bulletins unwatchable. Mark Jennings and Anthony Flannery, you should apologise for your crimes against excellence, against the language and against humanity … and resign now. You are disgusting blights on our cultural landscape. To all such militant mediocrity-mongers as you, including the Prime Minister who goes out of his way to sound like an airhead, Perigo intends to be dangerous as hell.
Excellence is the fruit of thought, of reason. Reason was the glory of the excellent Greeks you see behind me, the men who first applied their minds to Life's Big Questions, instead of accepting false beliefs ostensibly handed down by non-existent gods. Their greatest exemplar was this fellow here, Aristotle, who said the starting point in our quest for knowledge and wisdom must be the world around us, not some supposed world somewhere else. That's why he's pointing down at what's actually here, while his erstwhile mentor Plato, points up to something that isn't.
Reason was the glory of the excellent Renaissance, which produced the excellent Raphael, who produced this excellent painting. Much better than postmodern smears and blotches, don't you think? The Renaissance also spawned the likes of Michelangelo and Da Vinci. As you can tell simply from contemplating their works, the Renaissance was a rebirth of the human mind and spirit after a millennium of crippling Christianity—in its heyday a stifling, savage superstition, much as Islam is now. Christian monks tortured and this woman for heresy, eventually killing her by scraping off all her flesh with oyster shells. I call any form of superstition “goblinism” because of its belief in a great goblin in the sky, traditionally known as God. I defend to the death anyone's right to believe in goblinism, but it is poppycock and piffle. It is anti-reason, and reason was the glory not just of Ancient Greece and the Renaissance, it is the glory of all mankind. To the enemies of reason, Perigo seeks to be a danger.
Reason's tool is persuasion, not force. Reason is the father of freedom. Freedom's greatest enemy in these postmodern times is political correctness. Political correctness presumes to dictate what we may eat, drink, think, smoke and wear. Political Correctness would forbid me to say everything I've just said on the grounds that it might cause offence. Political Correctness says all beliefs are equally valid and it's inappropriate to pass judgement on any of them. Never mind the offensiveness of the atrocities committed in the name of Islamogoblinism; just don't offend Islamogoblinites. Political Correctness is the enemy of free speech, and its headquarters, ironically, is academia, which is supposed to be free speech's bastion. In fact, a phalanx of fascist philosophy professors and their colleagues in sociology, Wimmins Studies, Literary Criticism and the like, all paid for by you, are doing their damnedest to shut free speech down, with politicians and bureaucrats acting as their brownshirts. Let's shut them down, not by force—that's their weapon—but the relentless resonance of ridicule redolent with reason.
That was my first Peritorial! That's Perigo's agenda … reason, freedom and excellence—to be exemplified at the programme's conclusion in a glorious snippet of music from the Romantic era, the time when music reached its pinnacle of excellence.
I'll be back with my first excellent guest after this.
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