Peritorial 9: Evil Evo and Unconscionable Umbragists

Lindsay Perigo's picture
Submitted by Lindsay Perigo on Sat, 2011-05-21 03:08

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Good evening and welcome to Perigo! I'm Lindsay Perigo and I'm dangerous. "Perigo" is Portuguese for "danger" and I seek to be that to the enemies of reason, freedom and excellence who rule the world in some shape or form.

One such form is eco-fascism: the filth who would bestow rights on weeds, rocks and puddles and deny them to humans. Think I'm exaggerating? Last month the socialist president of Bolivia, Evo Morales succeeded in having the United Nations General Assembly devote a day to debating a new treaty granting inalienable rights to plants and terrain. Evil Evo was not coy about his motive: to eradicate capitalism. Metiria Turei, Russell Norman and their ilk were no doubt creaming their hemp panties. Make no mistake: there's a reason greenies are in bed with communists: they are communists, who, having lost the economic argument for communism, now seek to win it via environmentalism. The watermelon Marxists, as they've been called: green on the outside, red on the inside. The Man-Made Global Warming scam is their latest ruse. Thirty-five years ago they were telling us we were all going to freeze to death in another Ice Age, but no matter. The Filth never let facts get in the way of some good scaremongering. Here's a Big Fact they are hysterical in their stampede to over-ride: rights can only pertain to beings capable of conceiving of them. The term “human rights” is redundant, since that's the only kind there can be. Remove humans from the planet as The Filth would like to do and see how much understanding of, let alone respect for, rights remains. It's human rights, of course, which the greenies and communists wish to eradicate.

Here's another Big Fact that evokes hysteria in The Filth: the climate has always changed and will go on doing so. Change is what the climate does. It's all to do with what the sun is doing and nothing to do with what man is doing. Man is being made by The Filth to feel guilty about his conquest of nature for no reason whatsoever.

Another form by which The Filth impose their will is the fashionable obsession with not causing offence. Winning a sports game hurts the feelings of the losing team, so winning must be eradicated. Think that's an exaggeration? Behold, I give you the Gloucester Recreation Soccer League in Ottawa, with 3000 children under its jurisdiction, who last year passed an edict that any team winning by more than five points would be declared the loser. The League's director said they weren't trying to take the fun out of the game, just trying to make it fair. I give you our Northland region's school swimming champ a few years back who declined to compete the following year because she'd been given such a hard time for being champ, leading her to conclude that “it's not cool to win.” How frightfully frightfully Kiwi. And communistic. And sick and disgusting.

Greenies and commies: just two of the many faces of The Filth, the enemies of reason, freedom and excellence against whose tyranny this programme swears eternal hostility.

That's the Peritorial. My guest tonight never minded the winning of sports games or the eating of animal flesh. He made a career out of selling it in fact. The Mad Butcher is next.

Mario and Elvis ...

Lindsay Perigo's picture

... never met or spoke. The story of their meeting was a fabrication.

Thanks for that Linz...

Marcus's picture

...your version is much better.

Since you mentioned that I googled it and found claims that Elvis and Mario met together in person once and spoke on the phone several times just before Mario's death in Italy.

I suppose you will already know this story backwards though Smiling

Did you doubt me Marcus?!

Lindsay Perigo's picture

Men have died for less! Eye

Here's the Mario, with decent sound and shots from all cameras:

Oh, and the admiration was mutual. Mario applauded Elvis's singing with "heart."

Elvis once shot a TV screen while Robert Goulet was singing on it. Goulet was a very competent, but passionless, singer.

The equally competent and equally passionless Howard Keel once attended a playback of Mario's pre-recordings for the movie Serenade. He sat in the second row, unaware that Mario himself was in the front row. At one point Keel opined loudly that "only a madman could sing like that." Mario rounded on him and said, "Howard, get mad yourself and fuck up occasionally, and you'll be a far better singer for it."

Mario was his favourite...

Marcus's picture!


Lindsay Perigo's picture

You really should keep up. Elvis' favorite singer was Mario:

Aside from O Sole Mio, Elvis's Surrender

was inspired by Mario's Sorrento.

Great eco-bashing...

Marcus's picture

...Linz. Putting Evil Moral(es) in his place.

I didn't know who the mad butcher was so this was quite instructive.

"Can't help falling in love" track was great.

I only just discovered the other day that Presley's "It's now or never" is adapted from "O' Sole Mio".

I wonder how many of his other hits were originally classical pieces?

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